Love is Not Abuse, a program of our founding sponsor Liz Claiborne, has revealed the findings of their recent study of dating abuse among college students. The results? Dating violence and abuse among college students is more prevalent on college campuses than previously believed.
According to the findings, a significant number of college women are victims of dating violence.
- 43% of dating college women report experiencing abusive dating behaviors including physical, sexual, tech, verbal or controlling abuse.
- Nearly 1 in 3 (29%) college women say they have been in an abusive dating relationship.
- More than half (57%) of college students who report experiencing dating violence said it occurred in college.
Young adult dating violence is a big problem, affecting youth in every community across the nation.
- Nearly 1.5 million high school students nationwide experience physical abuse from a dating partner in a single year.
- One in three adolescents in the U.S. is a victim of physical, sexual, emotional or verbal abuse from a dating partner, a figure that far exceeds rates of other types of youth violence.
- One quarter of high school girls have been victims of physical or sexual abuse.
- Girls and young women between the ages of 16 and 24 experience the highest rate of intimate partner violence -- almost triple the national average.
- Violent behavior typically begins between the ages of 12 and 18
- Violent relationships in adolescence can have serious ramifications by putting the victims at higher risk for substance abuse, eating disorders, risky sexual behavior and further domestic violence.
- Half of youth who have been victims of both dating violence and rape, attempt suicide compared to 12.5% of non-abused girls and 5.4% of non-abused boys.
While many of us know that abuse is wrong, how many of us may be doing it and not even realizing that our actions are borderline abusive? Take the "Am I a good partner?" quiz and find out if maybe you're the problem in your relationships. The quiz is from the Loveisrespect.org website that also has a lot of great information on how to tell if a relationship is abusive or healthy, and resources on improving your communication.
Am I a good partner? Quiz
Blog why you think dating violence and abuse among young adults is on the rise.
* Blog entries need to be at least 150 words long for credit.
In my mind of why dating violence and abuse among young adults is on the rise is because of this generation's lack of respect towards anybody but themselves. I have seen that my generation cares only about themselves and hardly ever show respect towards anybody except themselves and the friends. If you were to confront somebody today about something they did, more than likely they will respond with a "fuck you and tell you to fuck off" (sorry for the language but its true). Music and TV today also play a part into why this is happening. Most rap music glorifies "beating hoes" or treating women like crap. It is sad when society easily forgives Chris Brown for beating the crap out of Rihanna but give it a couple months and it will blow over and his fans (especially girls) come back to him like nothing happened. I think if corporal punishment came back in school and in the home (getting beat by teacher or parents for doing something you're not supposed to), it would change things for sure because it did for me.
ReplyDeleteAbuse is on the rise in my generation because there is no respect for women, men or even ourselves nowadays. I see all these “pre-teen” girls walking around in slutty clothing because it’s going to make them popular. They advertise themselves as just another warm body for a guy to have in bed, that’s not exactly respecting themselves. I’m not defending men who act like pigs but it must be hard for guys to respect girls when they go around like walking sex dolls. Honestly I feel like all of this started as a result of bad parenting and our society. My parents had no issue spanking me and telling me no and of course when I was a child I hated it but now I’m happy they did actually raise me to have respect for others and myself. I’m still shocked when I see young girls walking in these outfits that would suggest they have a night job in front of their parents. I one would never want to wear those sot of outfits nor would I ever be allowed to wear them in front of my parents and I’m not a child anymore. Girls are taught to dress like they just got off their shift at the local strip club and guys are taught to “fuck bitches, and get money”. Our society does nothing but encourage this behavior
ReplyDeleteOkay so I tried taking the quiz after I was done it just went blank but I’m assuming that I’m a good girlfriend because I don’t do those things on the quiz. I think domestic violence in relationships both physical and emotional is on the rise because more women are doing nothing about it. They are becoming the victims really easily and early on in the relationship; and not getting to know the person before getting into a relationship with them. I do understand though that some women don’t have a choice sometimes because in extreme cases the women are watched constantly with surveillance, always having to take calls from the abuser letting them know they are still home. They are locked out of society and are threatened every day. In those situations it’s hard to get out especially when they don’t have a support system to help them take action. I just think getting to know the person you want to pursue a relationship with first before actually making the commitment is the most important thing anyone can do.
ReplyDeleteThe people in this country, young and old alike, have lost respect for God. With God left out of the picture of people's lives, it leaves them free to do whatever they think is right in their own eyes. This is reflected in the crumbling family unit and in the loss of respect for oneself and for others. Children are not taught to respect and obey their parents and consequently they get older and continue displaying this behavior. They do not respect authority, others, or themselves. From this springs many evils including abuse and violence. And since those who have been abused are more likely to become abusers themselves, it is an epidemic that is frightfully increasing. The prevalent use and abuse of alcohol and drugs is not helping the situation either. People are capably of much violence when under the influence of something other than their right mind. From generation to generation, this horror of abuse and violence will only increase unless the hearts of this nation turn back to Jesus.
ReplyDeleteI believe that the reason dating violence and abuse is on the rise is because of bad parenting, most of the habits or negative traits come from somewhere. Children pick things up quickly, and if they are not corrected they can easily take a wrong turn. We experience things at a very personal level and the way we think is influenced by all of these factors. As well as the social environment, having a deep sense of personal awareness can help reduce these acts of agression. The way everything is building up, look at the foundations of our society the music, the movies, all of these things that influence mainstream media, that influence children. Some kids take them literally and become greatly influenced by these external sources. They learn nothing about seeing the beauty in people, in life too appreciate the small things. The virtues of having the experience of being human. To look at the positive qualities and embrace them instead of wanting to depict these redundant qualities that only get in the way of building relationships. Im glad my parents taught me these things early on, and I realize that the probability of others not having such opportunities is low but as we grow older we must account for our own decisions, and take responsibility for our own actions.
ReplyDeleteDating violence and abuse among young people in high school and college is on the rise because the youth are feeling more pressure from family and friends to be in a relationship. With this being said they are feeling the need to be with someone who shows them attention, whether it be good or bad. As long as they have someone there that they can call theirs, all the abuse and neglect will be worth it. For example, every time I am at a family even I am always asked if there is a other half in my life, if i am in a relationship. It always seems as if i am letting them down when i say no. Another influence for this would be media and tabloids. I say this because the media show celebrities moving from one person to the next and always wanting to be in a relationship and how it is okay.
ReplyDeleteAll in all it is on the rise because the emotional and sexual need in the youth is rising and they are willing to go through anything to have those needs fulfilled.
We live in a country where we use violence as a solution not as a last resort. If the United States doesn’t like what another country is doing they usually come up with a reason to bomb them or to start a war. The US is in an abusive relationship with everybody including its own people. It’s no wonder why people use violence like that too especially teenagers."Monkey see monkey do" mentality. Every day the lines between respect and abuse are getting more and more blurred. Teenagers are very impressionable whether they want to believe it or not and you can thank the media for that. They see people like Chris Brown and Rihanna who have had a very public domestic abuse case where he beat her and she went back to him years later. Whether you think so or not Chris Brown benefited from it. Yes it hurt his reputation but he’s even more famous now. With fame it usually means more money. There are girls on twitter, Facebook or another social media posting things like ‘if I was in Rihanna’s place I would let Chris Brown hit me at least I’m with him and he loves me.’ They have no idea how dumb and ignorant they look. Young people (male or female) probably believe that they won’t have to pay the consequences because the person being beaten down physically or mentally made them do it. And believe that the person will always end up coming back because that is what happened to Chris and Rihanna. They might believe that they will gain respect from people around them. You can see that in our class where the majority of the students have just graduated from high school. They still think it’s a game, the way they talk to each other and the way the treat each other. It shows how blurred the lines are. I’m only a year or two older than them but even when I was their age I never treated people with disrespect. We live in a place where there are virtually no consequences unless they take it too far, that is why abuse is on the rise.
ReplyDeleteMy opinion towards the rise of abuse in relationships is how the media tells us how great and amazing it is to be in a relationship. Woman are becoming more and more desperate and any ounce of attention they jump to it. Woman seem to be lowering their standards and not letting someone show them how great they can be.
ReplyDeleteEvery single time I turn on my tv there is an ad for a dating website. These websites are making it easy to find a partner but are these partners really the "right" person.
Also, my whole life I was taught to be independent but if I was to find someone to treat them right. To treat them the way I also want to be treated. Which is why my boyfriend and I got a good grade on the quiz. We both are educated and both know how to treat each other. Maybe these abusive relationships are rising because these couples were never taught "The Golden Rule". They were never taught how to treat others the way you wish to be treated because of bad parenting skills. Parents buy their children whatever they want so they can just be quiet. Of course this is going to cause problems for these children later on when it's time for them to find someone.
Going back to the media, celebrites are also making it the "okay" to be in a abuse relationship. Like Rhiana and Chris Brown after that whole incident Rhianna as many woman would do she went ahead and forgave the jerk.
So I belive there is the lack of education when it comes towards whats wrong and what is right in a relationship, the pressue the media and our family give us towards getting marriend, and the media for not giving the spot light towards better role models.
I think that dating violence is starting to rapidly increase for many reasons. One reason being that there are more and more kids growing up in broken homes. Kids these days do not have the luxury of having two parents, so they don't get the full discipline that is needed. Teenagers want attention and they have so much hidden anger that they unleash it to their significant other. Another reason I think is that in the media and tv shows you see a lot of relationship domestic abuse, physical and verbal abuse. I feel like teenagers some how get that it is "okay" to slap my boyfriend because he was being a jerk or that it is "okay" to shove my girlfriend for getting in my face. The truth is is that it is not okay for anyone to lay their hands on anyone else. I think that this has because such an issue in today's world because the society allows it. That is just my take on it.
ReplyDeletethere is more than one way to abuse a person. of course physical is probably the worst, mental and verbal abuse are very harmful too. No type of abuse is good for a relationship There are many people that are becoming more abusive as time passes and it doesnt make sense to me. when abuse happens it takes a toll on the relationship because you just have to keep resolving problems over and over again. females also think its okay for them to put their hands on a man and thats not alright either.
ReplyDeleteDating violence for young adults is on the rise for many reasons, but one of the biggest reasons is due to drugs and alcohol. They are more prone take different action than they normally would without knowing it that can be abusive. For example my cousin was with her boyfriend for 3years and once he turned 21 he started drinking and experimenting with drugs. One night he came home super drunk and high and he tried forcing himself on her, and when she refused he beat her up and left to his friend’s house. The next he went home and tried apologizing but it was too late; she had a bruised eye, fractured rib, and broken finger. All of this happened just from having too much alcohol, and experimenting with drugs. She broke things off with him and hadn’t talked to him in 5 years. Now she is married with three kids and is happy where she is at in her life.
ReplyDeletei belive that young adult abuse is on the rise because now a days people are falling in love alot younger than they use to, and sometimes those people arent mature enough to handle being in love. a kids point of view of love is to always be with each other and not be around any other opposite sex. and when they other person wants to hang out with friends they get mad and start flippin out because they believe that there is something going on when there is not. so jealousy kiicks in and you start to go through phones and stalking, and accusing. and even though there is nothing going on and your partner is telling you the truth you dont belive it so they start to get even more mad becasue they think that their partner is lying. it all comes down to how you can handle your emotions when your in love and some people fall in love to quick and at a young age so they arent mature enough yet to know that they are being abusive.
ReplyDeleteI think there are a number of contributing factors in regards to why dating violence is on the rise. Without dismissing the severity of the issue at hand, I think it would be important to note that this spike in dating violence and abuse might be attributed to the fact that simply more incidences are being reported in recent times. In the past there may have been a larger stigma surrounding the issue and therefore some women might have been afraid to speak out. These high numbers might reflect a larger number of women finally coming forward about the injustices done to them. Another factor to cite might be how society and the media glorify and dramatize these negative relationships. From a very young age, children are influenced and impacted by the things they see and hear going on around them. In many cases, the media just exploits how these terrible things can occur in relationships with little to no consequences.
ReplyDeleteAbuse in relationships is increasing, not just cause the lack of respect that is being encouraged on tv, movies, etc, but because of the fact that children are growing up in an environment where mommy and daddy are fighting each other verbally and physically. when people grow up in this kind of circumstance, the parents teach their kids that violence is the proper way to do things. It all starts with the examples we set as parents and as a people who have different views, no a days woman are objects and disrespected. in the end violence in relationships happen because parents and the media make it ok.
ReplyDeleteI think dating violence is on the rise in the younger generation because of media. Music and television promote disrespect and abuse and the younger generation obviously has more ties with media and technology. Being disrespectful and being superior ( the men usually) is promoted a lot through music and the people making the music, so it becomes something to be looked at as being cool. Guaranteed if all music and television promoted respect and healthy relationships abuse in relationships would be lower than ever.
ReplyDeleteI think violence is on the rise due to multiple reasons: broken homes, lack of respect, media and other reasons. Are we instilling violence in children’s head at an early age (video games, horror movies, and music)? How much TV do we watch, do we become immune or desensitized to these images?
ReplyDeleteWhether it is verbal or physical each one is terrible for anyone to endure. I tend to believe that verbal/mental abuse is worse than physical-bones heal, bruises go away but the emotional aspect of abuse lingers for years.
I also think that violence will continue to rise due to the lack of liability of one’s action. How many people in our class know someone that was a victim – what was the accountability of the person who committed the act? It may be easier to prove that a physical crime has happened, how do you prove that you were verbally abused?
I think that dating violence and abuse among young adults is rising in numbers because we are a selfish generation. We want everything, we want it fast, and we want it our way. There are so many reason why people can be abusive. Being selfish is one way to lose respect. I find it annoying when people have to post about their problems online or bash each other because it is only adding fuel to the fire. Making each other mad by acting out like that doesn't help anyone fix the problem. I feel like we are so pushy with each other when we really want something and we don't care who gets hurt. People have become so self absorbed with their image and technology that parents are forgetting to discipline and guide their children. There are too many influence around us to have one thing to link to violence and abuse.
ReplyDeleteI think a lot of people use media as a scapegoat for violence, because it's never just TV, music, movies, and video games that can be to blame for the way a person is acting if they are able to discern fantasy from reality. A lot of the time, young adults that end up in abusive relationships witnessed their parents abusing each other. There have also been studies conducted that make a connection between our current economic slump and the increase in dating violence. In a particular study on this subject nearly half of the teens that were surveyed grew up in families with financial issues and said that they had witnessed their parents abusing each other, and in the end the behavior they witnessed ended up seeping into their own personal lives.
ReplyDeleteI think that over the past few years dating violence and abuse many young adults has risen in both the colleges and high schools because (in my own view) would be the mass media, the attention some people would get and at times the parenting. The reason I believe that mass media is one reason is because society has gotten comfortable with exposing such gruesome acts on TV back then in the 50's you would never see anything related to abuse which made it at a low point. Attention: for this it usually varies on the individuals themselves. Some people are at times pressured to be in relationships or get married quickly so at times they will go with anyone(even if he/she is an abuser) and put up with their behaviors (this also connects to media in certain ways). The lack of parenting or just mirroring what they see in front of their eyes at a young age. An example would be that the child see's that her parent is being abused by the other parent every now and then at first the child will be scared but later on will get accustomed to it and soon will start to believe that being abusive is just a norm in a marriage.
ReplyDeleteDating violence and abusive relationships is on the rise because of the lack of respect some young adults might have for their partner or themselves. Their are many ways to be abusive in a relationship, physically and verbally. I think some men or women might choose such an action because they are afraid that they will be left so to keep the partners self esteem low would be the key for them. Music and Tv are big factors in abusive people, it makes people think it is normal and everyone does it. It might make guys lose respect for women or the women lose respect for herself so, it brings them to that level. Abusive relationships might also stem from the types of parents they had when growing up, if they are divorced or not, and treatment wise. What would be the norm for someone growing up in a broken home, they might only see it one way. So, there are many reasons for abusive relationships, its unacceptable and should be intolerable.
ReplyDeleteI believe that ever since social media began with hit websites like "Myspace" violence and abuse has risen because of what men and women do for what they want and for their enjoyment. Media is one of the leading causes for violence and abuse. Now that we use social websites like Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram, the violence continues to rise because of the amount of time people use and abuse it. Also with these different kind of video games that are showing violence and other explicit content, the gamers are getting that violent mentality in their head and leading into violence. Even music that some of these artists are making even have violent and abusive lyrics. Big time artists like Tyler The Creator and Lil Wayne say a lot of lyrics that young adults and kids listen too with violent material and make it seem like it's okay. Sure they are the best rappers in the game right now, but things like this have an impact on society when it comes to violence and it's rise. It's not just physical abuse that is on the rise too, but verbal abuse continues to happen more and more.
ReplyDeleteI believe the reason why there is such a high level of abuse in college students is mainly because they’re college students. Most of them are young and slightly if not entirely stupid. These abusive actions and jealous feelings are found mostly within the young couples in contrast to older couples that respond more mature and experienced towards situations in which a young reactant would react to. I relate best to inspirational comic book quotes like, “with great power comes great responsibility”, and I’m sorry but I just don’t think most college students have the responsibility to handle the power of being in a relationship; responsibly. It takes responsibility to trust your partner and have patients for them and self-control when you get in a fight and all that. As well the media is to blame for influences towards acting violent, but it is still up to the person to make the act.
ReplyDeleteWith our generation, relationships have changed from chivalry and mutual respect to more casual behaviors and independence. I believe that over time, people have been more tolerant of casual behaviors in relationships, and this has put an idea into the minds of younger people that respect isn't as important. Along with respect meaning less in relationships, young people are also more willing to put up with the types of things that at one point were completely and totally unacceptable. People stay together because they blame themselves for the way their partner treats them, they believe they deserve the abuse , and sometimes they just think that if they put up with it for so long that the person will eventually change. Lastly, I am most certain that our generation’s self-absorbency has led to the ultimate downfall. People start to think only about themselves, and refuse to do anything that doesn’t benefit them in the end, and with a partner tolerating abuse, it’s easy to hurt someone to get what you want out of them.
ReplyDeleteIt showed that I would be a good partner. Most of the question were based around respect. I am very respectful with all my friends and especially my girlfriend. Without respect there wouldn't be a relationship at all with another person, unless its an abusive one. It surprised me when I moved to the U.S. how younger people are being more and more disrespectful to their elders, friends, coworkers and even partners. Also the way media portrays abuse or being disrespectful a normal thing causing even more problems between couples. I see couples come to my restaurant all day and you can easily tell which ones are in a healthy way just on the way they order a meal, some guys would either offer their girl to choose whatever they want while others will complain and tell their what can and cant have while he gets the most expensive meal on the menu. Being respectful and considerate about your partner is the healthiest way to build a strong relationship, I believe.
ReplyDeleteI think that abuse is on the rise because of the lack of respect that both boys and girls have for each other. its sad to see how not only do guys treat girls with little respect but girls seem to have an equal lack of respect for boys but they are both in completely separate and different ways. I believe that girls who dress provocatively bring the lack of respect on themselves which causes the domestic violence. On the flip side of the coin boys who choose to act lazy, foolish, or "gangster" bring a lack of respect upon themselves from their female counterparts, which in turn can also lead to other forms of domestic violence. This violence can cause a spiral in any sort of domestic home or relationship into an inflating situation which can cause more and more violence. This process is all started by the simple everyday life decisions made by the people that they effect.
ReplyDeleteI believe that abuse has risen because unfortunatly most women are weak and don't know how to stand up for themselves. Mostly all women are naive and don't understand how wrong abuse is in their relationship. I was taught growing up by my father that no man lays a finger on you or he'd just take care of them. As a young women I am very aware of the way I should be treated and I will not tolerate any sort of abuse. I'm probably the abuser in the relationship if it came down to it lol jk. Violence in a relationship is no where near healthy and should seek out of that relationship fast.
ReplyDeleteI feel like there is more violence going on between couples now a day because of the environment we have around us. like other mentioned in some of their post, there is music, movies, friends, families, etc. all making it seem acceptable to abuse someone. I think women are easy targets for men to pick on and abuse because a lot of women don't have any respect for themselves because of the environment. If someone was to hear a song or see a movie of a women in a abuse relationship it would be more easy for the women to respect it and think of it as the norm. i'm not saying only women are the targets here. but there is always more cases of men abusing women then there are of women abusing mean. The abuser likes to have that control and society is accepting it with not making it look bad on shows, movies, music, etc.
ReplyDeleteCristina and Kelsie, Thanks for your comments, but this blog was due Tuesday the 16th. We are now on blog 10
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