When placed in the right situation (or wrong situation, in this case), our emotions can prompt us to act in ways which are counter to our beliefs. Please note that some of the factors listed below are drawn from Buss and Shackelford's work on infidelity.
What high risk factors influence an individual's willingness to cheat?
Attractiveness
All things being equal, an individual’s attractiveness influences how likely he or she is to cheat. Attraction comes in many different forms – it is influenced by one’s physical appearance, one’s social skills, and one’s tangible resources (money). The more one is in demand, the more likely one is to cheat. People, who have higher incomes, more education, and successful careers, are more likely to cheat than people who are less successful. And physical attractiveness also plays an important role.
Opportunity
Again, all things being equal, the more individual free time people have the more likely they are to cheat. Couples who have separate social lives, friends, careers, travel plans, and so on are much more likely to cheat than couples who spend most of their time together. The more opportunity people have to cheat, the greater the odds that cheating will occur.Risk Taking
People who like to take risks or have a sense of adventure are more likely to cheat than people who are more fearful or timid by nature. And there is most likely a genetic component involved in risk-taking behavior - some people may be predisposed to taking risks.
Sexual desire varies from person to person. Some people have a very high sex drive while other people are much less concerned or interested in sex. And people with a high, rather than low, sex drive are more likely to cheat. Again, sexual desire appears to be influenced by genetic factors. Some people are inherently more easily aroused and driven by their desire for sex than other people. People who have multiple affairs are often addicted to the novelty and excitement which infidelity can provide. Men, more so than women, also tend to have a higher sex drive and are more likely to cheat.
Some people view love and romance as a sacred bond between two individuals. Other people see love as a game, where the goal is to manipulate another individual and gain emotional power over a partner (ludus). People who view love as a game are much more likely to have multiple love interests; cheating is just another way to gain control over one's spouse. Also, people with a dismissive style of attachment, are more likely to cheat.Relational Problems
As problems emerge in a relationship, people are more likely to cheat. Infidelity is more common in relationships where people feel misunderstood, under appreciated and where fighting and bickering is common.
Some people, due to their position in society, their beliefs about gender roles, or their cultural upbringing, believe that it is their right to cheat on their partners. In other words, some people believe that cheating is a privilege to which they are entitled. Such individuals, philanders, often engage in infidelity with little guilt or remorse.Which of the 7 risk factors do you think has the largest influence on whether someone cheats and the increase in infidelity among young people today? Why? Give us an example if you know of one. Lastly, what can one do to "cheat proof" their relationship?
* Entries must be a minimum of 150 words.
I think that Risk Taking is far the greatest factor on deciding if one choice outweighs the other. Risk-taking can be the tendency to take action in behaviors that can be harmful or dangerous, yet at the same time provide the sense of a positive feeling. The action can bring a positive feelings in-the-moment. The risk taker can feel some type of reward. I do think that people who are risk takers are more narcissistic then others. I don’t think that someone income, education, or socioeconomic has any matter with taking risks or not. I also do not think that age has any bearings with being a risk taker or not, these risks may be different – but I think if you are a risk taker, your thought of receiving a positive feeling outweighs the consequences. I think if opportunity presents itself a risk taker will grasp the chance of the risk.
ReplyDeleteOut of the 7 risk factors I think that attractiveness is the largest influence on people who tend to cheat. Mostly out of movies and my friends experience, if their partner thinks that they are super attractive, that they can get anyone they want even if they are in a relationship. In my personal opinion, I do feel that even if you are attractive that you can control yourself not to cheat. These 7 risk factors are almost ridiculous to me. I think that if you are in a strong healthy relationship with true love, there would be no room for cheating and you shouldn't want to hurt your partner in that way. The only way to cheat proof your relationship is to just not cheat. I feel that if you are worried where your significant other is then that is definitely a red flag. You shouldn't have to worry about what they are doing or who they are with. Not every has the luxury to have an amazing relationship. I just feel like cheating is something that you can control. You can't just say "oh I cheated because I'm hot". No, thats stupid. There is no excuse for cheating in my book.
ReplyDeleteI think out of the 7 factors that Attitude towards lave and romance/ Attachment and love styles has the largest influence on why people cheat. If your attitude towards love or relationships is negative, or the person has had a lot of negative experiences in relationships, then they start to become less significant. If you don't value your relationship then cheating will come easier to the person. For example if someone has constantly been dumped or cheated on, then that person will start to see relationships as valueless and cheating won't be seen as a big deal to them because they feel like the relationship was going to end eventually anyways. If your significant other doesn't take pride in the relationship or value it then that is a sign that they don't care for the relationship and when the opportunity presents itself they will cheat.
ReplyDeleteI think that risk taking as well as relational problems cause the most trouble in young peoples relationships today. I believe that a lot of young people don't know how to relate as a part of a couple, but I believe it is because the parents now aren't really teaching kids to relate to other people , everything in child rearing is so dedicated to the child and only the child that it breeds very selfish people who cannot relate to others very well and so how to maintain a relationship is the last thing they care about till later in life when they learn how important it is to relate to people. I also believe that risk taking is a big problem in relationships because it seems like young people are very into pushing their boundaries and risk taking in relationships is very thrilling because at any moment they could get caught and that thrill makes it worth while for them.
ReplyDeleteI think what causes the most problems in relationships and what cause most to cheat is attractiveness as well as sexual desire. Most people cheat, and then it's done. Just for the spur of the moment because they have a sexual desire based on someone’s attractiveness. Sadly there are times when just once isn’t enough, just one person isn’t enough and it is continued behind their partners back until something makes them stop or they finally get caught. There are a lot more factors that come into play however I strongly feel these are the two that have the biggest influence on cheating. It is rare for someone to cheat in the relationship with just something small. Most cases I hear have always been that their partner went too far, that forgiveness couldn't fix. Cheating is never okay, there needs to be enough respect and communication in the relationship to say when it's not working out anymore. Going to someone else while you are in a relationship is not the answer.
ReplyDeleteI believe that the love styles and relational problems are most influenced to infidelity. Every cheater has an excuse for why they cheated, they can never take the blame for themselves. Every victim that has been cheated on has been blamed that it was their fault. And the reason for it was because they would fight too much, they couldn't handle the stress, so they resulted to cheated on their partner. Now, to me, if you really cared for your significant other, instead of cheating and using the fighting as an excuse to cheat, they would communicate and try to resolve the problem. Also, another huge factor in cheating is their type of love style. Of course someone who things the whole love scene is a game is going to do exactly as that, play the game. They will simply manipulate their partner into believing they are the most sweet person ever and would never do such a thing and would do exactly the opposite. And the saddest part of it all, they will never tell you unless the victim finds out for themselves. I think the only way to "cheat proof" your relationship is to simply find the right person, because no matter what there's going to be those little fights, the times when you're away from your partner, when they find someone who makes more money than you, so the only way is to find a faithful person.
ReplyDeletei dont think that there is a certain reason to why people cheat and to what causes them to take risks and things like that. if you are going to cheat on your partner than maybe its just time to end everything right then and there because it means that you are obviously bored with your partner. To me i dont think that there is anything that can influence cheating because if you already have the thought of doing it in your head, then chances are that you are going to do it anyways. like people say, "once a cheater, always a cheater" the only way to really tell if the other person is cheating on you or not is if they are being shady with you and not telling you who they are with, or if they never ever let you look at their phone even if you dont want to look at who you are talking too.
ReplyDeleteRelational problems i think is the biggest inflence toward infidelity because when people are hurt and mad they act out without thinking, i'm not sure maybe i watch way to much tv because the only reason why people cheat on tv is because they had a fight, but then again it's also all fiction. But these ideas on television are coming from somewhere i choose to believe that's reality. Alcohol can play a huge role in infidelity because often times when someone is upset about a fight with a partner they use alcohol as something that will help them forget for the night and feel better, it helps with some of the pain but also plays the part in ones bad decisions. Great example is when rachel and ross are on a "break". Ross believes it was a break but Rachel still though they were together somehow. They had a fight; ross drank and he 'cheated" on Rachel. Classic mistake is using alcohol as your substitute for that person for a night.
ReplyDeleteThe largest influence I believe has to be their attitude towards love or romantic / attachment and love styles because everyone has their own peronality and their own views on what a relationship should be. We all differ like the ludus lover is known to be the "player" because he/she views love as a game. They are really in it for themeselves as opposed to thinking about their significant other or partner. When having relationship issues the problems a lot of the time come from within themeselves then they start to show and some partners differ from one another then that's when you can start to see the relationship problems externally. It's all in how the person views on what love should be. Some people are in it for the long run and some people are in it for the sex. Attractiveness and sexual desire is just the cherry on top to them to cheat.
ReplyDeleteI believe the most prominent factor when it comes to cheating is obviously sexual desire. To me it seems this is the foundation upon which all other factors are based upon. This is because without sexual desire one tends to not want to have sex. Duh. You need to want to have sex before any of the other factors can even come into play. This creates a great deal of infidelity today because of how sex is portrayed all throughout youth culture. Sex is everywhere; commercials, TV show, online, in movies, in video games, in social networking, and even in books. Media has an effective role in spreading sexuality and continually introduces sex to today’s youth.
ReplyDeleteThere is nothing you can do to cheat proof your relationship. There are too many ways to cheat and you cannot keep a leash on your significant other every second of every day. This makes it is imperative to develop a level of trust and openness in a relationship. The threat of cheating forces you to become a stronger individual and demands that you take risks that make it all worth-while.
I personally think that out of these seven factors, that relational problems and opportunity are the biggest influence on whether someone cheats or not. I feel that when problems start occurring it is best to communicate in order to prevent further issues in the relationship. When there's lack of communication, it opens up the doors for infidelity.
ReplyDeleteWhen an opportunity is right in front of someone most people just go and take it, without even hesitating or thinking of what their about to do.
The largest influence category that leads to cheating I believe is relational problems, because today especially with the amount of technology that is available it is easy to escape a problem that is happening within a relationship then to confront it. A lot of people instead of dealing with the situation face first, they lean away from it and that tends to escalate later, causing only more problems for the relationship. Disputes need to always be settled whether or not one wants to, it is important to always have a clear mindset whenever you are with someone you love. Without these qualities relationships with ultimately fail because having a stable relationship that deals with issues and problems in definite terms provides a positive outcome in the future.
ReplyDeleteI think that in my opinion, attraction is the one of the 7 risk factors that has the largest influence on whether someone cheats. When someone that is in a relationship and doesn't have that physical attraction anymore to them, they then have that mindset to be attracted to another person. This leads into cheating because being attracted to somebody else can cause flirting, messing around sexually, and even sex. You see it in movies, t.v shows and I've even had friends cheat on their girlfriends and ruin their relationship because of being attracted to another girl. Some people cant help being attracted to another person and is just a feeling that they cant really get rid of and messes up a lot of relationships all the time. AN example is my friends and even myself being attracted to somebody else when in a relationship but I believe that you shouldn't cheat on anyone if you're in that situation. Break up with the person if you're going to do that because cheating on them is far worse than just telling them that you're attracted to another girl or guy. Attraction is a very strong and a powerful feeling/emotion. Lastly I believe what we can do to "cheat proof" relationships is just tell them or ourselves to not cheat at all. Get out of a relationship if they are going to cheat and mess around. Flat out simple as that because everyone know that "once a cheater, always a cheater."
ReplyDeleteI believe what influences cheating the most is a combination of both attraction and opportunity. I here all the time from my coworkers how they have cheated on a girlfriend at some point and most of the stories follow the same pattern where they found someone attractive, talked for a little and ended up somewhere where their girlfriends wouldn't find out at all. Most of these situations also involved alcohol which impaired their judgment at that time and increased their sexual desire towards the person close to them. The way I make my relationship cheat proof is by avoiding being in any situation which could lead towards cheating. You can tell when you first talk to someone if they are interested or not and here is where I decide to either take a risk and keep talking to them or shut them down. I bring up my girlfriend into the conversation just to let them know im not interested but some people do not even care which makes things alot harder to have them back off. The main thing I always try to avoid is to let them create an opportunity for us to be alone so usually Im always with a close friend around or find an excuse to leave. The more you stay around someone the harder it would be to walk away so I find it easier to avoid someone from the very beginning. When you trully care for someone you would try your best to not hurt and if you cheat they are always going to find out somehow.
ReplyDeleteI believe it's a combination of relational problems, sexual desire, and attractiveness is what leads to one (or both) partners cheating in a relationship. I think all three of these can, and normally do, go hand-in-hand with each other. If a man in a relationship were to become rather close with an attractive female, his sexual desire will increase due to the fact that he finds her attractive (and if he can tell if she's easy or not). The cheating phase will normally start when problems in the relationship begin. Some partners do it to get back at their significant other, and some do it because there are issues in their relationship that they'd rather avoid and instead of fixing it, just make it worse. In my opinion, and easy way to "cheat-proof" your relationship is to build trust and a good sense of communication from the start of the relationship. If you can take the time to build trust up with your partner, naturally you begin to open up more. To me, feeling comfortable talking to your spouse/significant other about anything is important. If there's something you feel that you can't tell them, then there's a crack in the trust foundation of the relationship. Being able to communicate means you understands what the other person wants and how to best fix it. By not communicating, we start to assume or avoid what needs to be done, making the problem worse and adding stress, which then leads to cheating.
ReplyDeleteOut of the seven risk factors, I believe that opportunity has the largest influence among young people today. I think that if some people see a chance to cheat, they will take it even though they know it is not the right thing to do. I know some people who have cheated in the past and they know it is wrong but still do it as long as their partner doesn't find out about it. I don't really think there is a way to cheat proof your relationship. You just have to find someone who you trust won't cheat on you. If someone does end up cheating on you, I think you should end the relationship because I believe that they will continue to do the same thing.
ReplyDeleteI think that out of all the different factors on why people cheat, opportunity might the biggest reason to do it. Sometimes when a relationship is going well, you feel happy, everything is working out and simply you get used to the idea. At one point there is moment that you believe that it is not going to change so in a way you start feeling like there is not enough excitement in your life. You feel that you need something to keep you entertained. Especially if your significant other is really in love with you and you know that they have no intention to break up with you, you feel that finding some “outside” fun will work out just fine. Then one thing leads to another, your significant other breaks up with you and it is in that moment when you feel bad about what you did; it is that moment when you realize and appreciate what you had because it is now gone and you not only lost your happiness, you also harmed someone who really cared about and is now going to have a bitter taste on other relationships because of you
ReplyDeleteI think Attractiveness and Relationship problems are the largest influence. I feel like a lot of people get bored in relationships because of problems or just doing the same thing all the time and feel like they "love" the person so they don't want to leave that person they just want to have some fun. When people find someone else more attractive, not with just looks but with their life then they might cheat because they look at it as more of a fantasy. Also when people are having issues with their partner some people look to cheat so they might get back at them or they feel like it would make them feel better. I don't really think there is anything you can really do to make sure they wont cheat. most likely if your all over what they're doing and always wanting to be with them so you know they're not with others, your going to push them away and end up getting dumbed. I would look at their past and chances are if they have cheated a lot in the past then they're most likely going to do it to you.
ReplyDeleteI actually believe the seven risk factors are most dangerous toward cheating when applied specifically to the person. I have a friend who probably falls under having the opportunity to cheat so he does it. While he has positive values for some of the other six risk factors. As well i have another friend who falls under several categories but not at all to where he'll cheat at opportunity, unlike friend #1.
ReplyDeleteAlthough if i had to chose I'd have to say that sexual desire is the most toxic. Its like a drive, or stimulant that some people are more reactant to. Like an impulse of someone with OCD to flip a light switch 13 times, once the idea of it reveals itself inside the persons mind it acts like a toxin corroding away ethics until its desire is met.